Friday, 3 July 2015

Why Did You Go Away?

Just wanted to share something that happened today, because I haven't really talked personal much in a long long time.

Today, after dinner with the boyfriend,  we were just window-shopping at the mall before he goes for his gig. I then saw at the atrium something which caught my eye, and we went and checked it out. Okay, I went and checked it out, because he soon walked off to look at other stuff. I think I didn't take too long, maybe 5 minutes max? And he did walk back over to check on me about 3-4 minutes in. When I was done and thanked the salesgirl for answering my questions, I tried to look for him around the booth, but he was nowhere to be seen. 

Now, of course I got upset. When we go out together, you don't just wander off missing or too far away without first informing me of where you want to go, even if you have zero interest in what I was looking at! I walked around the entire atrium, and in the end decided to call him, after having reached a state of exasperation and anxiety. 

I now understand how my dog feels. Alton would go into a state of panic attack whenever I left the house. He's now almost blind, so he doesn't always see when I leave the house. I also try not to let him see me leave because he would scratch the door for a long time after I leave. I've been told that usually when I leave the house without Alton knowing where I've gone to, he would search the house in a frenzy, walking anxiously from room A to room B to the bathroom to the living room to the kitchen and then to room C and back to room A to try to look for me, and this may carry on for an hour after he discovers I'm gone. 

I'm not saying I am anxious like that. I don't think I have separation anxiety, but I do get annoyed when we are supposed to be hanging out together, and you go off leaving me with no idea where to find you. 

It didn't help that his phone's microphone is faulty, so I wouldn't be able to hear anything when he answers the phone, except when he switches it to speaker mode. I heard nothing, so I hung up. I then got really upset and sent him a text that went something like this -

Me: Hello?????
Me: Why did you just walk off like that???

He then called me back. After he told me where he's at, I hung up the phone and walked (grouchily) over to where he said he was.

I did not expect what I saw next.

He appeared in front of me with a big red rose in full bloom.

Him: Why you so fierce...?
Me: (Still upset) Because you left me standing there alone and I didn't know where you'd gone or where to find you!
Him: *gave me the rose in his hand* I went to get this for you...

This time I was in a state of upset and surprise, plus I was still angry but at the same time happy and touched, so don't try to imagine my face. It must've looked pretty contorted. And I must've looked pretty fierce still because he actually looked scared and upset.

Me: I was looking all around for you and I looked so awkward just now! (must be a face issue)
Him: But I want to buy flower to surprise you, and I cannot tell you where I'm going ma...

I'm a pretty tough woman to surprise, as he must've realised by now (will tell u more on another post), but I'm touched by his trying to surprise me time and again, just to put a smile on my face. =)

Sorry baby for being such a silly quick-tempered bitch. I blame it on waking up too early. But do know that I really really appreciate this beautiful rose, and all the flowers you've given me, and the gestures you often make in trying to make me happy. 

現在情緒比較放鬆了, 看到這朵綻放的玫瑰花🌹,我的心情是像這朵花一樣,是盛開的。
謝謝你。


P.S. Also, note to self - Next time I'd rather let Alton know I'm going out, than leave him panicking trying to find me in the house without avail. 

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