Thursday, 22 October 2009

J and her new wound

I went filming for 《想握你的手》 today, and told myself I'm going to take pictures so that I can share with you guys. I happily took some nice pictures with my mobile, then came home n realized... I can't upload the photos from my phone to the laptop.

Remember I told you I sent my laptop for repair? So now I'm using my sister's Thinkpad. Thing is, I can't bluetooth the pictures to the Thinkpad because it doesn't freaking have the bluetooth function. It's using Infra-red (my god~!) which my phone doesn't have. I can't just use USB because I need to install the Samsung PC Studio software (which comes in a CD) before the laptop can detect my phone (I'm using a Jet by the way), AND the laptop doesn't have a CD/DVD driver slot. -.-"

Okay, that aside. I'll come up with a way later..then blog about what I initially wanted to blog about.

Was supposed to go sing KTV with 2 friends today (I LUUUUUUUUURRRVE to sing in case you guys didn't know...and the only time I can belt my lungs out at night without anyone calling the police is to go sing at a KTV - more on that later)

Anyways, it was cancelled, because one of my friend is going thru a rough time. She just found out her ex has been cheating on her ALL along...sucks huh. So the breakup wasn't because the relationship 'went cold', or "No, there isn't anyone else. The problem's me, not you" shit. Why would someone who's loved you suddenly say anything like that anyway? -duh- There IS someone else. Almost always. Why can't they come clean anyway? This way at least we have a reason to hate you and we can move on more easily. It's damn painful when you tell someone that you suddenly just don't feel anymore. All the great times suddenly equate to zero. And we cry and ponder upon why or how it can happen...we have no reason to hate you. We just feel plain helpless.

For my friend now, the breakup has been months, but the new discovery made the breakup seem new and the pain just seared through, sharply, again. It's like being stabbed once, and when you're over the shock n the pain n just getting used to the very sharp pain, the person who stabbed you decides to rotate n squiggle the knife and pluck it out and stab you, one more time. It really doesn't help to go through the pain twice, and your efforts at being nice back then? Pui.

BUT, if you tell us you're Sorry (even though a million ones won't help us feel any better), and just come clean n tell us you've found someone else and you no longer want to be with us but want to try it out with this new person, it's a different story. It is. All the more if you don't try to be nice here. You shouldn't. It makes us feel you still care and don't want to hurt us and maybe still love us when you don't really give a shit anymore. So DON'T be nice. It gives us a reason to hate you and let our love for you die, which makes it easier to let go, move on, and reclaim our hearts and lives, and live again.

I know some of you are SUPER 犯贱 and wants to love someone else yet still have us pine for you. Grow up. It's not bringing you anywhere except to make our lives more difficult (not that you care, I know). N for some of us who can become psychotic, you may end up getting strange calls at night, suddenly find yourself being followed, stalked on Facebook, or getting incessant smses. We may, if we're provoked or upset enough, try to break you and your new beau up by finding out who the new person you're seeing is, and send him/her a message with ANY kind of content on Facebook. You know how convenient FB is, it's damn easy to find out who you're seeing, we don't even need to know his/her phone number to harass the said party. It could be a sexual escapade you guys have had before, how you cheated on us and how you're sending this msg as a warning, your ugly closet secrets, and the list goes on...I'm sure you've heard that "Hell has no wrath like a woman scorned". Applies for some men, too, in case the lady cheaters think they can get away. That, is not going to be very helpful if you're thinking of further developing your relationship with your new hand accessory.

Enough said. Let's address the other party (us) now. By the way, You - the cheater, and Us - the victim who still loves and was so badly hurt, are just terms for easy referencing. Not implying anything else, if you're thinking too complicated-ly.

Give up. Cry your shitload of tears out. The harder the better. N move on. Remember all the failed relationships you've been through? You survived, didn't you? And when someone nice comes along, weren't you glad you've let go of the last so you could embrace the new relationship (even if it turns out shit later, you'll still have had good times for most part of the relationship)?

He left, girl. Concentrate on you, now. I know I say it like I'm so good at this, but I'm guilty of missing n crying n pining over what's lost and what could have been too. At the same time. I know I need to concentrate on myself, now. The relationship didn't work out. It's not anyone's fault. Not yours, not his, not mine. You guys are just not meant to be. You may be, 5,10 years down. But not now. Blame your 八字,if you really have to. But everything happens for a reason. Anyone who's reading this, you guys can leave a comment,  tell me how your last breakup was a blessing in disguise. ;)

I'm sure something better is about to happen to you, girlfriend. Like being able to speak French fluently. ;)
You know there are people who loves you, no matter what.
Finish hurting, then KTV soon, ok? *wink*

2 comments:

  1. i teared as i read the post.. yes, i got stabbed by the knife. not once, not twice, not thrice, so many times it's countless.

    Just as I had decided to let the wound heal and let go, he came begging again. When I let him into my life ONCE again, (stupidly, regardless what my frds and family, even colleagues! had said) he went MIA as usual and turned cold. I feel like his kite. not his favourite some more, cos he already has one China-made kite at home which he will return to everytime. it seemed like i was on rental.
    i knew the fact he was with her. i was in self denial. he told me he will be breaking up with her blah blah blah... anyway i'm sure i would win a movie / novel award if i, one day, decided to write a book. it will be 10 yellow pages thick. - Title: lifestory of a foolish girl & a bastard.

    initially i thought i had moved on. guess what? i dreamt of him 2 days ago, of us together. hence maybe that's reason why i felt so emo when i found out about last night's incident. you know he changed away the photo? i try not to think is cos he thought i might chat with him ba. like you mentioned, 人总是要留一条后路给自己. if that side doesn't work out, he can always come to the kite rental shop again. 贱right? leave le still want us to have feelings for them. Men. all the empty promises, and 山盟海誓 shit..

    yes, i have to move on. i know he doesn't care anymore. he has moved on so well and i shouldn't let him affect me anymore, especially when he's not in MY life now. i had done my part contributing to the well with my daily tears when i was with him. i'm not going to let him hurt me anymore.

    dear, thank you for your post.. i will get over this, soon. of cos with ur and D's help. I wana crack some mirrors. Let's go KTV soon!! *wink*

    Thank you for loving me. *self proclaimed one* kaka!!!

    you-know-who

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